Day 1: Dom, sub or Switch

This is Day One, in My 30 days of kink; Dom, sub or switch?

Day 1: Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.

KinksmI am most definitely a Domme (Dom, in the format of the question)! I have briefly and recently discussed My past experiences as a Switch on the FORUM so I will not get into that here. I believe what made Me actually feel like a switch or a sub in My past was that for a short time I could easily identify as a masochist. It could have been more a stage of exploration and discovery but I did self identify as such. These masochistic tendencies are what brought Me to the world of BDSM.

Though, I no longer identify as submissive, switch or masochist, I am grateful for the experiences and the sensation I felt while enjoy those scenes. Without them, I would not have been able to find My true calling as a Domme. I know there are many people who will read this and think that having subbed in the past makes Me less Dominant but you can kiss My ass. I owe you no explanation. I believe in honesty above all things and therefore My disclosure of past experiences.

I believe My time spent subbing and switching as well as My time experiencing torturous scene has created an incredibly well grounded, well educated, well rounded Domme.

Definitions are always difficult for Me. Especially when it comes to aspects of sexuality. Since sensuality, sexuality and kink are so fluid and the relationship within them so different from individual to individual it is difficult to create and apt definition.

I believe what makes a Domme, the main characteristic She has that let’s you know She is the one for you, is the ability to create an environment where the submissive can flourish. A relationship where the sub, slave, whatever descriptor you want to use, can blossom into something more than they were before their service. This applies to just about any D/s relationship. The qualities of a Domme and the qualities of a submissive is sooo dependent on the style of relationship they have.

maso092614My Dominance stems from a love of control, a need even. I micromanage, I am obsessive about things being done MY way. And though in some relationships that would be considered a negative, the style of relationships I have makes this quality a big plus 😉 It is one of the biggest attraction to BDSM that I have. I have discovered that I am slightly sadistic. What started as a curiosity and exploration as a maso was, retrospectively, a cry for knowledge about pain and an inability to morally get over Myself. This is a discussion that deserves its own post so I will get to that eventually 🙂

Being Dominant, is having power and using that power to mould your sub into your desire while simultaneously allowing them the oportunity to grow and bloom in Your service. This is what I hold Myself to and part of why I am so particular about who I am willing to take on as a permanent slave, PT or FT!

What are your definitions? How do you see yourself? Are you a Dom, sub or switch? Join this journey of 30 days of kink with Me and many others!

À bientôt,

Maîtresse Ambre Jade

1 (888) 726-2447

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30 Days Of Kink


30daysI have seen this 30 days of kink pop up everywhere most recently on the blog of one Miss Pearl whom I adore! Her blog is fantastic and you should read it but I digress! I have seen this pop up in a variety of places and each time think to Myself, damn I should do that! So here I am doing it!

I would also like to encourage others to partake. I can add links to your blogs below these instructions and really create a great list! Each day in this 30 days of kink activity is a new question, a new focus. It does not have to be done everyday. I will try but I am not promising I will manage, I am a busy Woman. This will be My post for today and I will start day 1 tomorrow!

30 days of kink breakdown:

Day 1: Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us. Find it HERE!

Day 2: List your kinks. Find it HERE!

Day 3: How did you discover you were kinky? Find it HERE!

Day 4: Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks? Find it HERE!

Day 5: What was your first kinky sexual experience?  If you haven’t had one yet, talk about what you hope to have happen. Find it HERE!

Day 6: Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy. Find it HERE!

Day 7: What’s your favorite toy?

Day 8: Post a kinky image you find erotic.

Day 9: Post a kink related song or music video you enjoy.

Day 10: What are your hard limits?

Day 11: What are your views on the ethics of kink?

Day 12: Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had.  If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.

Day 13: Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you?  Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?

Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?  If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?

Day 15: Post a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try.

Day 16: What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?

Day 17: What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?

Day 18: Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves?  If so, what are they?

Day 19: Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life?  If so, what are they?

Day 20:  Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand.

Day 21: Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)

Day 22: What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy?  How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?

Day 23: Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed?  How so?

Day 24: What qualities do you look for in a partner?

Day 25: How open are you about your kinks?

Day 26: What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?

Day 27: Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?

Day 28: How do you dress for kink/BDSM play?  What significance does your attire have to you?

Day 29: Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, princess, goddess, ma’am, sir)?  What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?

Day 30: Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.

This list is from Insatiable Desire, another great blog to check out!

Others partaking in 30 Days of Kink:

I will add as they come in, leave your site in the comments section or email Me

Empress Vox Siren
john david