Is it Important to Serve One, and Only One?

To only serve one Mistress… is that important to you? Is it important to Her? I have been a Dominant Woman for most of My life, went through a switch period, you know how fluid sexuality can be. Anyway, when I first started doing phone domination, back when I was working for phone sex lines, “you can only serve Me” came from My lips on a regular basis, emphasizing each words, each syllable. I wanted to encourage devotion by having them serve one Goddess. At the surface, it makes sense. But that’s all it was, a superficial creation of devotion that was, for all intents and purposes, meaningless.

How can it be meaningless to serve one Mistress?

It is not that having you serve one Mistress that makes it meaningless, it was the manner in which the orders were delivered. It means nothing to serve one Mistress when you are told to do so. Well, not meaningless, but I found, especially in the environment of a phone sex company, this encouraged jealousy, bickering among Women, lies from subs, ultimately it manifests a very negative environment. I want you to contrast being told to worship one Mistress vs it happening organically, as a natural progression of your devotion.

So i should serve one Mistress?

Here’s the thing, you should serve one Mistress if it feels right to you. If you are looking for something specific and are whoring about looking for the right dynamic (there is nothing wrong with that), make sure you are honest about it. An invested Mistress will want you to find the right dynamic that works for you and will allow you to worship Her while you are searching. Well, not every one feels that way. Some Dommes are far more demanding when it comes to who their subs are spending time with. For Me, I encourage people to look beyond just Me.

Why? I want you to find the right person who will have you craving only serving Her, or Me as the case may be. I want My devoted slaves to be devoted to Me because they are, not because I am telling them to be. When I first start phone domination, I was met with a multitude of new challenges mostly due to the medium transition, in person/lifestyle vs phone/online, are different. Especially in the beginning. Bulldozing someone into worshiping Me and Me alone seemed ridiculous.

What happens with submissives that serve more than one?

My subs that serve more than Myself are encouraged to look around, try new people and even get some direction from Me as to whom they should try. Why do I let them? Because if their needs are not being met by Me alone, that will not change, what it will change is their desire to be honest with Me. I want them to feel at ease talking about what they are looking for. Especially when it comes to dating and finding a lifestyle Domme partner. I would be ignoring their desire for a physical relationship with another person solely because what? I don’t like sharing! I have no qualms sharing.

There are submissive people who want you to limit their contact with other Dommes, and there is nothing wrong with that either, but it is not something I am in the habit of doing. When I started adopting My views to one of sharing and honesty, I found that more of My submissives became monogamous and they stuck around longer. Why? Because if you are true to who you are and they are true to who they are, if creates a refuge and place of honesty. The dynamic becomes stronger because as a Domme, I see them deciding to serve one, Me rather than being forced into it. submissives in turn see this attitude as encouraging because it reminds them that you will be there to help them transition to another if that is needed and you are allowing them the choice to serve you and others.

Of course, this is not to say I cannot manipulate the situation so that you only want to serve one 😉

What are your thoughts on serving multiple Dommes or being exclusive? When you are spending time with a Domme as a stepping stone to something else, are you honest about it?

À bientôt,

Maîtresse Ambre Jade

888 726-2447

MY STORE

Total Control By Ambre Jade

Total Control with Ambre JadeTotal control is a surprisingly subjective concept. For each Domme and each sub, the idea of what constitutes total control varies. One would assume it would be obvious. your Domme controls every action, every thought, every moment of your life. This is a valid definition and idea but how is that represented in a practical sense? For those who are not live in slaves, those who decide that a long distance relationship is more practical or those who have financial dealings with their Dommes, the idea of total control is a little more difficult to define and for some, even to perceive.

I receive a number of inquiries about how total control manifests itself with a relationship with Me. Many people have their own perceptions on how a total control dynamic should work or ideas on how it works that are different from My manifestation of this style of relationship. As the individual relationships in question, contribute a great deal to how it presents itself, it is easier for Me to list some misconceptions about total control that are just not valid when working with Me.

What Total Control by Ambre Jade is NOT about:

  • Ruining your current relationships. I am not about ruining your other relationships. Like your marriage or destroying the bond between you and your children, mother, aunt, family, etc. you can see where I am going here. I do not believe in the destruction of your marital status. That is a dynamic in which I can control how you behave. your Wife can give you things I cannot. I control how you interact with your Wife, partner, girlfriend, etc. I think these relationships should be cherished and I will determine how you can add to them.
  • Destroying your financial stability. A broke slave is a useless slave. I have no desires to strip you of every penny you have. What I do control, is how you spend. Potentially, how you can earn. I create and control the budget. Obviously a portion goes to Me!
  • Isolation. I do not want you completely isolated. I want you to have other relationships, friendships, dates, a social life. I do not want you completely isolated from society. I encourage you to go out, with My permission.
  • Being a doormat. you have hobbies, likes and dislikes, activities you enjoy, etc. Those should factor into My total control of you. If there is something within our dynamic that is not working, there is a time and a place to voice it. The time and the place will be determined by Me but you will have an opportunity to voice thoughts and concerns and all those fun things.

The most important thing when it comes to total control is FULL DISCLOSURE. I need to know about every aspect of your life in order to determine the who, what, where, when, why and hows of your new life. This is a serious commitment both from you and from Me. I am taking on the decisions and course of your life. That is a huge commitment from both of us. Total control is not something I would offer to just anyone. There has to be a good rapport between the two of us for it to be something we can work with.

À bientôt,

Mistress Ambre Jade

MY STORE

 

Guilt and submission

For some, guilt and submission seem to go hand in hand. From a personal standpoint, this is not something I understand. Perhaps, I am too hedonistic in My thoughts but I rarely if ever feel guilty. We all have our moments but guilt is not something in My usual stream of emotions. When talking with someone new yesterday, trying to decide if he deserves to be indoctrinated by Me, he professed his feelings of guilt when following his D/s side. Guilt and submission for him are a package deal. This statement frequently falls to My ears. While My personal emotional experiences do not have anything particularly enlightening on this matter. My experiences as a Dominant Woman certainly does.

Guilt and Submission as a Tool

Domme Ambre Jade talks about sensations of guilt and submissionFor some, there is an erotic component to feeling guilty. They find the sensations of guilt and failure something that adds to their sensual experiences.  For them, guilt and submission adds a spice, a further deepening to their orgasm, servitude, faith, etc. My puppy, whom I have spoken about numerous times, loves feeling guilty. OK, no he does not but his arousal (My cock, it is Mine, I own it) responds to it like nothing else. I delight in every moment where his guilt becomes overwhelming and then deny him that orgasm he has been waiting over a year for!

Not everyone has a similar response to guilt and submission. This is one of the reason, I ask how you feel about the emotion. How does it make you feel when you are guilty, etc. I tend to ask many, many question. My interrogation fetish has no limits on the discussions it likes having!

When Guilt and Submission are a Negative

Not everyone responds like My puppy. For them, the sensation of guilt does not add spice. It can, in fact take away from the experience. As a Domme, there are many moments where I decide to force you into negative emotive spaces. Mainly, for My Own amusement. Guilt over being a submissive should not, should never be used in such a manner. Guilt and submission are generally experienced by those that have not necessarily completely embraced their submissive side. They fight it. The feelings of guilt can be viewed as an attempt to fight against their nature. The feelings of guilt can be the manifestation of their fight with themselves.

How Guilt and Submission Can Work Together

This is where having a Domme, a proper Domme, can be a very beneficial relationship. The feelings of guilt can easily be resolved or at least minimized by follow orders from your Domme. your Domme will know the most effective way for you to compromise between your feelings of guilt and submission. your Domme will lead you, this is Her purpose, to lead you and satisfy both Her Own needs and yours. Dommes know how to use these sometimes conflicting emotions to Their advantage.

Important Factors When Dealing With Guilt and Submission

  • Honesty: Be honest when you are having trouble with the sensations of guilt.
  • Accountability: Understand that your Domme is not forcing you into the submission, this is your nature.
  • Communication: As with any relationship communicate your feelings with someone who can offer an objective view or at least someone you can be honest with.
  • Be Real: perform check ins with yourself. Balance yourself between your submissive self and your vanilla self. If you are having trouble communicate it.

There is so much more to say about guilt and submission. Many people have had issues and I encourage you to share your experiences as well as coping techniques.

À bientôt,

Maîtresse Ambre Jade

My Store

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